Erik Wants A Kiss
by MusicalWriter1709
Summary: Erik has wanted a kiss all his life, so when Nadir introduces him to ASMR kissing videos, Erik leaps at the chance to listen, hoping to get a vague experience of what kissing is like. This will lead to something unsuspecting for him. Perhaps something more real.


All my life I've only wanted to experience one thing! Okay, maybe several, but this one particular thing was desired most above all: kisses.

Weep, dear reader, for I've never been kissed before, not even by my own poor mother. No woman has ever wanted to kiss Erik the way Erik has always dreamed. In the streets, while lurking in the shadows at night, he would sometimes get a glimpse of couples stealing kisses under the stars, and an upheaval of jealousy would consume him. He often surmised about what it would be like to kiss a female. Would her lips be soft? Cracked and dry? Would he be able to feel the curves of her body as it was pressed against his? Would his hands be wrapped around her waist, gently caressing her face, or tangled in her hair? Or what would it be like for a female to kiss him? (_Oh, reader, shame Erik for thinking this, but he can't help it!_) Would she be able to stand it without vomiting? Would she wrap her arms around him for support because her knees would be weak? Would his lips-well, they're not really lips-be soft or too gross for her? Will she be able to handle the coldness of his skin?

There are too many factors.

Visiting a prostitute has popped into his head before, often after drinking, which only influences his loneliness...and his horniness. But it was not meant to be! He would arrive at the whorehouse, gaze at all the females ready to lay on their back, and freeze. Because while _that_ may be something he desires, it is not on the top of his list. (_I want a kiss_)_._ And all he could envision were their laughter in his head. He knows that asking for a kiss would sound utterly ridiculous to them, and he's done being laughed at.

Today, though, my curiosity might be pacified! Yesterday, my infernal friend, Nadir, stopped by to help me with a few things around the house. I just moved into a quiet neighborhood, and I am not the young man I once was. He was helping me with my furniture when he decided to talk to me about an inane subject.

"Erik, you're always so busy, don't you ever just relax?"

A dark chuckle escaped me. "'Relax'? No, when does a living corpse have time to relax? A dead corpse has all the time in the world to rest, so I shall wait until I'm six feet under in a bolted coffin."

Nadir gave me a pointed look. "Seriously, Erik. Your heart won't last too much longer under the constant strain your in."

"What are you-?"

"You rarely sleep, eat, or drink."

"They're accessories for me."

"For any _living_ thing, it's a necessity."

"_But Erik is half dead._"

Nadir and I stared at each other for a moment.

"Have you ever heard of ASMR, Erik?"

I blinked in earnest surprise. "No."

"Its full name is autonomous sensory meridian response. People use this to help them concentrate, sleep, study, or relax. They find videos of this on youtube and listen with earbuds-"

"Those things will ruin hearing! Don't youths nowadays worry that they won't be able to hear something monstrous-something like me-sneaking up on them?"

"Erik," Nadir sighs. "Try it. The relaxing part is that it's supposed to sound like the person is right next to you, beside you, behind you, often sending a tingling sensation around the ears. Although, I've heard some people feel it go down their back."

"That's weird."

Nadir did a double take. "_You_ find that weird?!"

"Yes."

"Erik, as a concerned friend, at least try it."

Looking down at the ground, I gave it a quick thought. I shrugged. "I guess I can experiment with it-once!"

"Thank you! Will I see you tomorrow?"

"Yes. Do _not_ forget my antiques." I rubbed the back of my neck. "...Nadir."

He turned at the door, hand on the handle.

"What kind of sounds do these youtuber generally make?"

He shrugged. "Anything. They do paper sounds, tapping, water sounds, whispering, kissing…"

My head snapped up. _What?_

Nadir smiled brightly, knowing he's finally caught my full attention. "Bye."

I almost scoffed. _Kissing? _

So here he is, Erik, twenty-fours hours later, sitting at his computer googling ASMR kissing videos. I've browsed, but not clicked. It's like standing outside the whorehouse all over again. Except these women could not-will not-refuse me. They can't even see me. So why does Erik feel ashamed?

_Oh, just pick one, you great booby!_

The voice inside my head jars me, and my finger twitches onto the mouse, clicking on a video.

The girl has a pretty face. Not a show stopper, but there is a delicate innocence that warms my heart. The first thing she does is smile, and it lights up her hazel-colored eyes. If we were actually face-to-face, I doubt she would be smiling at me like that. She introduces her youtuber name and states that she plans on doing some kissing sounds, mouth sounds, and some hand sounds.

There is only one sound I care for. My palms are twitching, ready for the sound, the supposed feel-or tingle-of the sound. My forehead glistens with sweat behind the mask, and my heart pounds hard in my chest.

Her face moves to the side of the camera and...and there it is. The sound-the smack. I gasp, lips trembling as a swarm of tingles surround my right ear and travel down my spine. My hand clamps over my mouth.

_Oh, that was lovely. _

The video was fifteen minutes long, and it was fifteen minutes in Heaven for me.

* * *

Later in the day, I feel a slight smile grace my lips. The video was thoroughly enjoyable, and I actually felt something. While I still long for the real thing, I am happy with the substitution.

Today Nadir needs to bring over a few of my more valuable objects, which he held on for me until I finished moving. I didn't want the movers' dirty, greedy hands all over them. These are antiques we're talking about.

The engine of a car stalls beyond my bedroom window, and hearing this before, I know exactly whose engine it is. I hear the door open, then close after a beat. Then another door, with Nadir grunting as he leans in and pulls out one of my antique vases. There are some voices, Nadir's and-well, that's new-a woman's. They are greeting each other. Her voice tingles my ear, and I close my eyes in order to concentrate on it more. Her timbre is sweet and dreamy, and-

_Clink!_

My jaw drops.

Nadir just dropped my vase! My beautiful vase!

I burst out my front door and run into the lawn, ready to give Nadir a piece of my mind.

Nadir looks up from his kneeling position, paling a bit. "Erik. Erik, I'm so sorry."

"Do you know," I ground out, "how precious that was!? It was an 1887 Beijing vase! It was worth a fortune!"

Nadir gazes behind me. "Um, Erik-"

"I figured the movers would do something idiotic like this, not you! Erik trust-"

"Erik!"

"WHAT!?"

Silence, and then a gentle, lilting, "H-hello."

Erik freezes. _How could he forget that she's still out there._ It's that woman's voice. He didn't realize just how wilting the voice was. It was beautifully devastating.

Then he turned around, and saw the beautiful, wilting rose.

She had bushy, curly hair, an angelic face, and a small figure. Her eyes were big and blue. She was gorgeous.

"Hi. I don't think we've met yet. I'm Christine." She holds out her hand.

Erik-_I_-take it hesitantly. _A woman wants to shake my hand?_

"I'm new to the neighborhood too," she continues. "Though not as new as you. I moved here about six months ago-to this day, actually."

_Come on, Erik. Speak!_

"Umm" She lightly stutters, turning red. "I was just introducing myself to your friend."

_My damn tongue won't move. I'm letting the angel embarrass herself over me._ _I'm a disgrace!_

Nadir, thankfully, butts in. "This is Erik, Christine."

She smiles, just like that girl in the video earlier today. And this one is looking at my mask-no! She's looking through it...yet she's still smiling. Her eyes shine.

"Are you guys sure you won't like some help?"

"Oh, no, but thank you." Nadir reassures her.

"Alright. Well, I'll catch you both later, then?"

"Indeed," mumbles Nadir sweetly.

She turns around and walks back to her house.

I take two steps forward, and I feel Nadir try to grab at my shirt sleeve.

I inhale a breath, releasing it shakily. "N-nice to meet you." It was a whisper, but she heard it. She turns around and gives a small smile.

My heart pounds. _I will love you for the rest of my life, Christine. I won't ever give up on you-my beautiful angel. _For once, I smile a full smile for the first time in my life.

* * *

In the end…

Erik gets his real live kiss, which Christine was happy to give. In fact, she believes she'll continue to give him kisses for as long as they both live.


End file.
